Posted in Occasional Observer
Bradley Trevor Greive now on Twitter!
Have you ever found yourself at a loss for words when things have gone horribly wrong, or been left speechless when an outcome has exceeded your wildest expectations?
Don’t let these pivotal encounters leave you looking slack-jawed and stupid – Don’t dredge up a decent retort or winning compliment 20 minutes after the moment has passed – New York Times Best-Selling Author, Bradley Trevor Greive (BTG), has exactly what you need!
BTG proudly presents his new range of free Twitter Curses and Twitter Blessings, a growing library of potent and pithy utterances with which you can smite your enemies and heap praise upon the worthy.
• Unable to articulate your wrath? Then feel free to dish out BTG’s devastating Twitter Curses, including such classics as:
Twitter Curse #38:
May people pretend to like you in order to spend time with your pets.
Twitter Curse #11
May all the dairy items in your fridge be of questionable vintage.
Twitter Curse #35:
May your name feature prominently in public restroom graffiti.
Twitter Curse #10:
May you trip over a guide dog.
Twitter Curse #24:
May your pubic hair grow at an alarming rate.
Twitter Curse #21:
May your sexuality become a popular topic of workplace conversation.
Twitter Curses #1:
May your inquisitive orthodontist have the morning breath of a thousand apes.
Twitter Curse #25:
May dolphins spit upon your sandals.
• So overwhelmed with joy and gratitude that you are left tongue-tied? Then dip into BTG’s treasure trove of Twitter Blessings, including such gems as:
Twitter Blessing #5:
May your excuses for avoiding tedious social engagements always sound credible.
Twitter Blessing #15:
May your love-handles be easily concealed.
Twitter Blessing #11:
May you receive an uninhibited sponge-bath.
Twitter Blessing #6:
May you appear slightly more attractive in photographs than in real life.
Twitter Blessing #3:
May your foul elevator odours always be attributed to other people.
Twitter Blessing #7:
May you find forgotten chocolate in your fridge during a difficult time.
Twitter Blessing #4:
May your new business cards give a false impression of success.
Twitter Blessing #2:
May your neighbour’s rooster have a sore throat.
Twitter Blessing #12:
May you woo your lover at a picnic by winning the trust of wild animals.
To sign up for BTG’s Twitter Blessings and Twitter Curses join me on Twitter here
It’s easy and it’s free!
Posted in BTGTV
Behind The Blue Day Book. Part 3